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If I Had It to Do All Over Again

Posted by Chris Berry on September 3, 2008 in Introversion, Jobs and Careers

I didn’t develop a full understanding of my unique personality type (INTP) until I was nearly 40 years old. At that point I came to realize that I had been blindly pursuing a career path for which I was very poorly suited. The further I advanced, the more unhappy I became. I had been quite successful in my sales career, but was growing weary of the fact that the majority of my coworkers lacked any education or intellectual curiosity. By advancing into sales management, I hoped to be able to be take on some more stimulating challenges. Instead, I became responsible for training and managing a group of people who lacked any education or intellectual curiosity.

In my youth, I was a mystery to my parents and teachers, and my academic performance baffled everyone. I managed to ace any class that interested me with virtually no effort, while others left me so bored that I simply zoned out and didn’t listen to a word. My last two years in high school were spent at a small private college preparatory day school. I had higher standardized test scores than all but a handful of my classmates, but I graduated 33rd in a class of 34 students.

Most people thought I was lazy, which couldn’t be farther from the truth. When there is important work to be done, I am the kind of person who does not stop until it is finished. I simply had a different standard then for what I considered to be important. Adolescent rebellion also played a major role. I was pushed constantly to conform to someone else’s standards, but no one made the slightest effort to understand mine. The harder other people pushed to turn me into something I was not, the more stubborn I became in my refusal.

One thing I discovered about my self at a fairly early age was that when the pace of instruction was accelerated, my interest level and my academic performance peaked. Throughout high school and college I attended summer school on a regular basis because the format suited my style of learning. Summer classes typically condense a semester’s worth of instruction into two weeks of concentrated class time. I never took a summer class that I did not ace. I was not aware of it at the time, but Colorado College follows this type of schedule throughout the year. I would have gotten a great deal more out of my college experience in this type of atmosphere.

Since no one ever figured out what made me tick, I didn’t receive any worthwhile guidance when it came time to consider colleges or career paths. My father’s suggestion that I should become a CPA demonstrated just how totally oblivious he was to my fundamental nature. He never attempted to force his preference on me, but was quick to shoot me down whenever I expressed an interest in any sort of creative field.

If I could go back and do it all over again, I would probably study Architecture or Industrial Design. I have the ability to envision complex designs in my mind, and I get tremendous satisfaction from turning those visions into reality. When I walk into a house for the first time, I immediately begin to remodel it in my head. I can walk through a building under construction and envision the finished product with perfect clarity. The thing that held me back when I was younger is the fact that I cannot draw, but with the computer aided design tools available today that would not be an issue.

Unfortunately, by the time we reach our mid-forties, going back to school to study an entirely new career field is not a very practical solution. I will never be an architect, but I would love to figure out some other way to utilize my creative abilities. While it’s too late for me to follow the perfect educational and career path, it’s not too late for my son. At the age of three, he is already displaying signs of an introverted nature. I fully intend to figure out what makes him tick so I can provide the guidance and support he will need to find his own path.

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